*grunt*
I’m not a star…Somebody lied. I wrote a post in my car…I almost died. Always scribe after dark, so I turn into a gremlin. WordPress don’t know it got a light-skin negro in it!
If you don’t get the song reference, you should click here or listen/watch the youtube jawn at the bottom of the post. All you need to hear is the chorus one time and it’ll make sense. Anywho…
I was looking through my Formspring questions the other day and came across one that I been gettin’ some variation of for a few months now:
Since you are somewhat of an “e-Celeb” and people “know” you, do you ever think about becoming someone else on the net, like creating an alter ego and no one would know it was you? I think about constructing a secret life sometimes. *shrug*
Sh*t, I’m “somewhat” of an e-Celeb? Are you telling me that all this time I been stressing and agonizing about why my posts consistently under-perform compared to most of the SBM staff in terms of traffic is because people like me? Well whoopty f*ckin’ do! Let the ad revenue and invites to exclusive blogger events in upscale venues commence! **Phones Dear Momma Jackson while tear hangs for dear life on left bottom eyelash.** “I done made it Momma! I’za moving you into a slightly bigger apartment on a different floor of the same building and no we’re not gettin’ rid of my Compaq Presario from high school and freshman year of college! It still works.”
Cmonson.
Yeah, I’m not a star. Somebody definitely lied. I’ve been writing for 3 years and I’m just now starting to figure this out. Blogging hasn’t gotten me any substantial poon and quantifiable beats perks that I could cash and cop cases of 4 Loko with. It hasn’t gotten me VIP access to anything, unless you count my appearance at the NYC Quarterly event hosted by Paul Carrick Brunson…and that other event he did last June in NYC. You know what? Paul is good peoples, but that’s a post for a different day. What was I sayin’?
I break grammar and syntax rules.
This idea that I’m anything more than a regular guy that enjoys writing and happens to do it and do it and do it well wages war with my modesty. I won’t front. I do get frustrated when I see alter-egomaniacs rising to fame — especially when their writing is the equivalent of a rubber sword. I know at least one of you imagined someone writing with a dildo. Okay, maybe it was just me…imagining it, not writing with an actual rubber d*ck. The main point here is that I’ll never claim to be something that I’m not…yet. Let’s say I jump from 1810 followers on Twitter to 5,000. Maybe my subscriber count here goes from the feeble number it’s at now to 3K. Let’s even imagine that I end up in a list on The Root (I like) or some politically based (I don’t) list of top bloggers and/or writers. Notice I didn’t specify race. I don’t just wanna be the best Black anything. I wanna be the best period. But yeah, let’s assume I achieve all this. Then it’d be fair for us to have a completely different conversation about how I view myself and this star-ness. I’d still be modest. I’d also spend more money. And lastly, I’d be more liberal with my middle finger.
I’m perfectly fine in this role featuring me and will always be okay with it even though I know I’ll doubt myself at times. As far as creating an alter ego to hide from the people that are helping make me what I’m becoming with this writing stuff, that’s too much work. But best believe when I do exceed these goals mentioned above, I’ll remember the avatars and faces that joined me early and stuck it out. We’ll be rockin’ out on a tour bus to an enormous computer lab and eating skrimps, gourmet halal, and some vegetarian sh*t from Whole Foods.
I’m not a star. Somebody lied. I can’t wait til they’re telling the truth.
The More You Know,
I loved this post. It was real and it was insightful. I think you're an excellent writer and have taught me quite a few tricks of the trade which I greatly appreciate. You will get to where you want to be, I have no doubt about it. Keep on doing what you do the way that you do it Slim!
Appreciate it!
That’s my song! I feel like a real thug when I listen too it.
I hope you reach the status in which you aspire to be. I feel the same about my photography. Some people get a little following and get a big head(pause?) but not you and thats good. Modesty is a great characteristic.
Good work Sir
I wish I was bawse at photography. I feel like that’d be useful sometimes.
I hope you remain the humble writer you seem to be. Keep reaching.
"I done made it Momma! I’za moving you into a slightly bigger apartment on a different floor of the same building"
LOL. silly.
maybe you just don't realize that you might be making an impact. i still remember the uproar that black twitter was in the day you came out of hiding from Mr. Cartoon Avatar for that panel. i was only vaguely familiar with your name, but after seeing my timeline implode, i knew who you were. that's how it starts.. lol.
celebrity can be overrated. but i think it comes with you just doing what you love and people recognizing the passion, with any field. so … i'm sure you'll be fine and on Dancing With The Stars in no time. i just died at that visual btw. lol.
THIS IS MY SONG!!
No, really, I have this on constant repeat during my workouts. The more I listen to that Rawse, the more I like it.
Now, to the post.
Dude, you are well on your way to greatness beyond belief. Don't worry about your numbers at SBM. Cream rises to the top… #pause. lol. Keep up the good work.
Ross do be in the workout mix. His ear for hype instrumentals is great. I didn't start rocking with this song until later recently though. Kinda weird.
LOL @ Compaq Presario. As my first computer was a Compaq joint, too!
"I know at least one of you imagined someone writing with a dildo."
I didn't, but now I wish I had. But, my imagined rubber sword made that "wobble wobble" sound in the cartoons at least.
Ya know, I'm not nearly as eKnown as you and I've gotten the "celebrity" label. It's pretty humbling and weird… good weird, doe. It's a surreal feeling knowing people you've never met read your stuff, and even better when they enjoy it. So, while I may not call myself a celebrity, I do try to embrace the love I'm shown, because let's face it… all of us bloggers are narcissistic at SOME degree or our blogs would be viewable to our eyes only.
'Course it's always great to stay humble (of course, only if that's really YOU), but a little secret self-patting-on-the-back every now and then is cool, too.
“I do try to embrace the love I’m shown, because let’s face it… all of us bloggers are narcissistic at SOME degree or our blogs would be viewable to our eyes only.”
This is very true. I can’t even rebut it.lol
"Well whoopty f*ckin’ do! Let the ad revenue and invites to exclusive blogger events in upscale venues commence! " This line had me rolling lol…
You know, it's because of you I started reading SBM and Three Ways. Although you aren't a celebrity you are definitely a force to be reckon with.
Good post. 30 in 30 keep em' coming!
You like Rick Ross too? God hates that he's a part of my morning playlist. lol I let it play in the background while reading your post. I like this post because it's real. It's good to aim high but you seem like you're not aware of your current popularity. I never noticed your comments are lower. Maybe because it's Mondays? I dunno but Mondays are crazy for me so I read/comment less. Anyway, don't beat yourself up too much. I think you're very popular and your writing is excellent. Maybe growth is slow because you're writing for you and not changing for more popularity. Kind of like Rihanna with the whole S&M thing. I'm glad you're showing your personality and not "selling out". It's easy to be sensational and be popular but that kind of fame dies hard. You're have a strong following. You'll get where you want to be.
Thing is, I don't just look at comment count. I look at the overall traffic, what people are RTn and liking on Facebook. It's an overall thing I've noticed. Hopefully having this space over here will help me fine tune some things though.
In response to that follow up comment, i'm not posting at a specific time every day. Trying to write without rules for a bit and see what happens. I can say that by midnight there will probably be something new everyday.
Btw, when do you post? at midnight? Sorry, I’m slow.
Cool post man! I'm kinda new to the writing game, finally decided I was going to pursue it. Guys like you let me know I can do this and you make writing cool! I'm definitely gonna be a regular on here! Also, if you ever get the chance would you check out my blog, bobbybowtie.wordpress.com, I'd like your honest opinion.
Can you hit me up via the “contact me” page? I have some thoughts and didn’t wanna post them as comments on your site.
I think people always blow things up especially when it comes to online personality or these “e-celebs”. It’s a good thing though. At least they’re talking and wondering. Very good, humbling post.
Being the star the smartest people know about it always better than being a star to the same people who keep Tyrese tweeting and Zane writing. Now, if you want to be a star to that crowd, you’ll need far more pop-culture references and blatant pandering. Watch how you blow all the way up! Also, it will be a bit difficult to not be ‘You know the Black blogger dude Slim’ when you’ve already put your picture out there and floated in certain circles.
Slim, I’m just commenting to say that I love what you do and keep doing you… I am a lurker and have been lurking for quite some time, but I read everyday… even Saturdays and Sundays seem odd without my blog fix. In your “I’m back” post, you were offended that some people would read SBM and hate on 3ways… it was their loss. I’m proof that you get love all around… I was down with 3ways, love you on SBM, and I’m following you here… Best wishes in all your endeavors…
~sWeEtnEsS~
I started reading SBM because of your posts…that being said,
“Sh*t, I’m “somewhat” of an e-Celeb? Are you telling me that all this time I been stressing and agonizing about why my posts consistently under-perform compared to most of the SBM staff in terms of traffic is because people like me? Well whoopty f*ckin’ do!”
And
I know I’ll doubt myself at times.
^^^^^^^^^^
This was extremely endearing. I’m not sure if I can be that honest with myself not to mention with other people
Thanks for commenting. That's why I'm calling this site "The Real." Gotta give people a true look at what goes on in the mind and not just what the audiences dictate.
*De-lurks* I think part of it is that for the lurkers (like myself) there are certain names that are mentioned consistently across a certain circle of blogs/bloggers. There seems to be a “cool group” and while it’s certainly the fault of the lurkers for not trying to join the cool group, that group still remains…well…cool. To some, that group seems to have a bit of a celebrity status. It may be the whole “big fish, small pond thing.” That perspective may be why you seem to be an e-celeb. Blame it on the black blog awards. *shrug*
What’s understandable, laudable, and endearing is that you aren’t content with being the big fish in a small pond. The honest frustration that can be felt in this blog and the referenced formspring response, the humility that says “ummm I’m not a celeb, I’m just writing and trying to make it,” is what keeps the lurkers reading. I think it’s something that everyone who aspires to be “something” in their chosen field feels. They make it in some people’s eyes and others wonder why they still have ambition, still push for more, or don’t realize how great they are. Recognize and acknowledge the achievements that have people calling you an e-celeb now while you push to achieve the goals you’ve set for yourself.
All that to say: you’re a great writer. 3ways was awesome. You keep me, and lurkers like me, reading both this blog and SBM (especially on days when it can get a bit much over there). Chin up.
*re-reads.* that was doing alot for de-lurking.
Appreciate all this and interesting point about big fish, small pond. I actually have a lot of disdain for the “cool circles.” I hadn’t really thought of myself as part of one since I don’t have this extraordinary league of bloggers that I’ll associate with while ignoring everybody else.
I co-sign everything Cha Kaziah said. I'm a huge lurker…I'm a little shy and more introspective in real life and I guess I'm the same online too, but I'm always reading. I'm not really into SBM too much, but I loved your posts on 3ways and think you're freaking hilarious! That's why I followed you over here (I'm not a stalker though, lol). Popularity is relative. I mean, while you may not consider yourself an e-celeb, you do have a following and that is a blessing (which I know you totally get b/c of what you wrote in this post). You're probably touching (pause) more people than you realize. Shallowness is for a moment, sincerity is for a life time, and on top of all that, you're more popular than me, so, that makes you an e-celeb in my eyes! Heed the words of Earth, Wind and Fire my friend "You're a shining star/no matter who you are…keep shining!!! (that was a little bit corny, but you get where I'm going w/this. I can't help it, it's the old soul in me)
"E-celeb" I find that so amusing…
I enjoyed your response to the question, so honest.
I'm so excited about this blog… I can never get enough of you. (uhhh- your writing)
You are doing what you Love. So you are a Star
lemme not let out the fact that im showing my face on this here post jus so i will be in the eating of skrimps on a bus in a few…
i mean….
nehmind….
Don't sweat it, you're kind of a big deal. That almost made me cringe to type, because I'm loathe to make comments that could potentially gas up someone's head. However, one thing I like about you is that you come across as genuinely down to earth, so I don't mind echoing anyone else who's mentioned that they enjoy and respect your work. Personally, I feel as though I can relate to you more than other bloggers whose work I've familiarized myself with, both on and off SBM. You may not see the high numbers that you want just yet, but I think what you have is really valuable in that you're slowly (but surely) building a following of people who truly value your artistry. I hope that you've seen some positive changes as well with your increased level of interaction with your readers.
Things are picking up. I'm surprised at what's been accomplished here in a week. Just gotta keep plugging along.