A lot happening these days. It was a short week with a lot of stuff squeezed into it. Pause. I do have a few things to eff though.
Eff me for accidentally leaving the link to donate out of my post yesterday and sending it to email subscribers. People who opened the email were probably like “This negro Slim is tacky. Gonna ask people to donate and not include a link or something. I can’t see whatever image he’s telling people to click. Light-skinned beyotch.”
Eff my asthma for trying to make a comeback like an ex who suddenly realized the error of their ways.
Eff the amount of fried chicken I’ve eaten in the last month. It’s actually pretty disgusting. June will be much better for decreased fried chicken consumption.
Eff people who despise bloggers and folks active on the internet for no real reason. Why did I meet at least 3 people during Memorial Day weekend that were rude as soon as I or someone else mentioned blogging? Did you f*ck a blogger did you dirty after he did you? #uMAD?
Eff the fact I still need to do some summer clothes shopping. This is in the budget, but I hate the process. Must summon the power of woman.
Eff me for continuously talking about getting a cleaning service for my spot and still not doing it.
Eff the smell of dog droppings. I really don’t like it. I guess nobody does though.
Eff the Miami Heat. I’m applying for German citizenship today.
That’s it for me. What about you? Get your eff on. Get get get get yo eff on! *Timbaland beat thumps**
-Slim
Eff @Wisdomismiery for ripping me apart in his blog post this morning. The next time I go on a man-hating rant, I’m aiming specifically at him.
Eff y'all in the Northern hemisphere and your summer tweets, after suffering through a non summer that was rainy and anything but summer, winter came from nowhere and caught those of us too lazy to search for a winter boo unawares.
Oh and Eff my friend for trying to set me up with a 30yr old man who spells decided as "dycydd" and communicates entirely in text speak from facebook messages to tweets and emails…what about me, made her think I would find that endearing or acceptable?
Eff the fact that aforementioned text speak man could potentially work as a winter boo but I'm either too picky or have high standards and can't past the fact he just texted to say "hie, stil dycydd'ng where'vr u pik I'll lyk". No. Just. No.
I guffawed at the 2nd eff. Abs on fire.
LMBO at that whole last paragraph. wow. i didn't know those people existed.
He types worse than the teens in my life
http://bit.ly/izkPjj
One day, they'll understand.
Smart=Sexy
eff my nose for being stuffed up right now its too hot for this allergies are a bish
eff this heat its 90 and summer hasn't begun
eff Lebron – you slack bastid YOU LOST last night lol
eff it – its Friday I just got paid and I don't have nothing to do! Count down to Vegas!
Eff this Ohio weather, I want the heat back.
Eff clothes, shoes, socks, ect.
Eff these 3 pounds that can't decide if they want to stay or go.
Eff these guys hitting me up now, it's summer! Too hot for alladat!
Eff t-mobile for their shitty service and even shittier phones.
Eff t-mobile even more for making me think I am a getting a good phone so I extend my contract 2 more years!
Eff my allergies. Can't wear my contacts and I hate wearing my glasses!
Eff my glasses! (Always getting all bent out of shape and ish.)
Eff the police!
EFF MIAMI HEAT and all of their bandwagoning fans!
Eff his drought that Houston is going through. where’s the rain?
Eff unappreciative employers
Eff my ankle for being swollen when I the "cleaning spirit" has come over me.
Eff the NFL Lockout…I am new to fantasy football and want to do it again.
Eff my less than spectacular bank balance…why am I not ballin' yet?
On another note, Slim did you get all your funds donated? The meter I see still has the same total on it before I donated.
Have a Great Weekend Everyone!
it's Saturday but hell
eff being told that there's a porn star out there looking exactly like me (I don't believe it though and won't go looking for her to make sure)
eff porn star watcher for wanting to see my bedroom antics to compare…Dude, grab a Gatorade and quench your thirst
eff my weight for fluctuating…one day I'm 99lbs the next I'm 101lbs…pick one and stay there
eff my Tyler Perry dvd for just deciding to stop working in my computer AND dvd player. I now have to watch the whole play on YouTube whenever I want to see it
eff being unemployed..bills don't care that you're not working so eff them too
eff the person who said that they'd do something important for me that they really didn't want to and backed out at the last minute. He could've said no, I'd have understood
eff this same person for not telling me they backed out. I had to find out the hard way
Eff Chicago for their retardo weather (wasn't this my rant last week)
Eff the NBA Finals for messing up my action Thursday night
Eff the fact that as a teacher I got ALL of my checks on the last day of school and due to my imbalance with budgeting & my moving in July, my $ is going to be screwed up
Eff liking your college crush again 14 years later & the fact that he likes the NBA Finals :/
Eff my brother for just dropping a glass on the floor and now I am terrified I will slice my toe off