This week flew by just like this year. All the days are starting to blend together and I can’t tell when I did what anymore. Speedy weeks are usually good weeks, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t a few things to throw into the Eff Ems. Take a ride with me in the Eff mobile. Pause your heart out.
Eff that the most important week of the year at my organization is this week coming. Everybody is stressed and the last minute requests are piling up. My Outlook inbox looks hoarded and every time I cross an item off my to-do list, something else quickly replaces it. I’ll be very happy when this week is over. Something tells me I’ll be sleeping even less than normal. But wait…
Eff the fact that social media speak is starting to permeate non-social media conversations. I don’t like it. I don’t like it 1 bit.
Eff how shitty I am at bowling. I drop the ball. Literally.
Eff the smell of this popcorn chicken sitting here. It isn’t mine, but I’m bout to steal me a piece (pause).
Eff the return of the creatures and things that go bump in the night.
Hold me close,
Slim
Eff the fact that i have so many eff em’s today. But in an effort to not ruin anyone else’s friday, i’ll keep em to my self
Please allow me to co-sign. Eff errrrrythang.
Yeah.. I’ve been waiting on this. *cracks knuckles*
Eff sinus/ear infections. I feel like a 5 year old, and at any given moment my lip involuntarily quivers in pain. Still a G, though.
Eff dudes that get attached much too quickly, and I don’t even know your last name. I am not your Queen, bro.
Eff donuts and pastries. Face rounder den a mug.
Eff winter and dry skin. Looking like the 8th leper.
Finally, eff losing motivation. Starting over is a bitch, and I heard that she bites.
I’m done.
*drops mic and walks off stage*
“Eff winter and dry skin. Looking like the 8th leper.”
I’m sorry… I guffawed at that for some weird reason.
Eff last week’s eff
Eff my studio production teacher for giving us that whack mid term
Eff the MTA
EFF my my touch g3 I’m with my touch g4 now and he is fabulous!!
Eff all of the follow ups I haven’t made
Eff that I couldn’t bowl with Slimster because my broken pinky won’t let me be great!!
Eff this script that I cannot seem to finish!
Eff my Slumlord who its going to be mad when he has to write me a check in a few months for all of his fuckery
Eff that instead of me enjoying First Saturdays at the Brooklyn Museum that I will be prepping and cooking for my girl’s surprise brunch for Sunday
*le sigh*
Is it just me or is tension against the MTA rising in general? People been real irritated with it lately.lol
Eff 14 hour work days…more than once a week.
Eff not being able to really vent about the one thing that effed up my week because of client confidentiality. Eff corporate america for that.
Eff dishonesty in the workplace that piles on hours and HOURS of work into my lap.
EFF Ann Coulter and her stupid statement about “our blacks being so much better than their blacks” that has started this unnecessary debate on conservative blacks vs. liberal blacks. Eff her on so many levels.
Co-signing the effing of winter and dry skin.
Eff having to find a balance between pulling back because you’re not ready yet and still being relevent because you’ll be ready some day. Eff that.
Eff compleeeeeeeeeetely falling off of my work out plan and having to essentially start over. And eff that I can really only go to the gym before work since I never know when the hell I’m getting out. Jesus be an alarm clock and some motivation in the morning.
“Eff having to find a balance between pulling back because you’re not ready yet and still being relevant because you’ll be ready some day. Eff that. ”
Your pain…I feel. *hugs you long and hard while singing old hymnals*
LOL thanks for the much needed e-hug *hugs back and harmonizes old hymnals*
Oh p.s. Eff
Eff this HCG diet that I have to start over! Cuz I ate pasta!!
Morning to all!
Now leggo!
EFF THE MTA! The 4/5/6 lines were the most RELIABLE thing I had ever encountered in my teens. The way the 4 has been treating me like a stepchild lately is just…
EFF the fact that when my Professor handed back my midterm paper she also slid us the FINAL PAPER. Lady, REALLY?!
EFF the fact that I have the aforementioned paper, a clinical diagnosis paper, AND an oral presentation *pauz* due ALL ON THE SAME DAY and just for that see my next eff…
EFF December 1st!!!
EFF the fact that this morning my son was trying to teach me how to play the Pokemon card game.
EFF the fact that I am SUCH a good mom that I will Google how to play said card game, buy him many packs of these cards so he can have the COOLEST deck, and play for hours with him! I AINT GOT TIME FOR THAT!
Whew! Glad to get that off my chest…let the day commence!
Sharing a hotel room with a coworker, or better yet your BOSS, during business trips are awkward to say the least. I always see the person in a different light, most times bad. It’s bad for them too because I suffer from night terrors and sleep hallucinations (yeah) which makes me yell out and scream at night. I got issues.
Moving on…
Eff the people who annoy me on twitter through the DM box. I love twitter and tweeting but sometimes a break is needed even though it doesn’t really change sh*t.
Eff coworkers who come into my office and walk behind my desk to look at my computer screen. Did I invite you back here? This is my space and I don’t feel like minimizing anything.
Eff greasy Indian hair that needs to be washed every 3 days when the Black chick rule clearly states “Thou shalt have dry hair that you don’t have to wash often”. Why can’t I have this blessing? If I didn’t have a big head, I’d shave it all off.
Eff not being able to take a lunch break on a Friday.
Eff my co-worker Kelly. You’re a d*ck. I hope you somehow find this even though you probably won’t. I hate you.
Okay, I’m done.
“Did I invite you back here? This is my space and I don’t feel like minimizing anything.”
That’s what she said.
Added eff: Eff this fake Dallas BBQs in the West Village that is trying to charge me for an entire dinner + drinks for 3 people when we CLEARLY split the bill 3 ways. -_-
Here goes:
Eff the fact that it’s homecoming weekend but I’ll be in the library doing grad school apps
Eff the fact that my computer at work only has Internet Explorer – and the boss won’t allow me to download firefox O_o..
Eff my ex who thinks sending me corny love poems (that don’t even rhyme!) is gonna get me back.. no sir!
Eff the fact that I haven’t gotten more than 5 hours of sleep any given night in the last 2 wks.
Eff my hair which is a HOTT mess cuz there’s no time to make it look decent -_-
And Eff the weekend for only being 2 days long… it’s still not enough time for me to do everything I have to!
Eff my workout. Rested some injuries and now I gotta get back in the flow. pause
Eff not playing Powerball when it was $245 milli. Hey, you never know!
Thats about it. Lifes effin great this week!
Eff people projecting their bullshit onto every situation. We get it, you’re upset about something in your personal life. Be an adult and keep that shit to yourself homie.
Eff you?
Eff not knowing what day of the week it is at any given time. Someone had to tell me it’s Friday. Thanks for that.
Eff wanting to do so much. At least I’ll have some good stories later.
Eff the weekend, it never really feels like one anyway.
Eff having a shit ton of vacation days and not being able to use them. I’m about to drop a smoke bomb and disappear.
I share your Effs.
Eff this looking for a job stuff, and eff this economy for being so shitty. Eff that even with 4 college degrees, am an not doing as well as my friend in a thrid world country who is negotiating a compensation package with international travel expenses and private school tuition for the kids. Clearly I have made a wrong turn in life…..
Eff that when you are unemployed, Friday (or any other day of the week) is irrelevant. May as well be Tuesday….
Eff the fact that I was not even close to being productive this week.
Eff the fact that Ima have to look for a co-op spot soon. I’m kinda sorta hoping someone sees me engaged in some discussions on LinkedIn and offers me a job. lol.
Um..eff your couch.
Eff two hour presentations on Friday that you find out about on Tuesday. Not cool.
Eff eating so much candy and not brushing at night so I had to get five fillings Weds. and left work Thursday in tears and pain.
Eff 45 minute waits at restaurants.